Posted by: Neeraj | October 11, 2008

The Acceptance

Over the period of its existence India has not started any war. We have been invaded, time and again, by the Mongols, the Mughals, the British and in recent past by Pakistan and China. This statement of fact tells a lot about us as a nation. We have been taught to be subservient, respectful, non-violent and not aggressive. This has now become a part of our personality, well entrenched in our mindset and something very difficult to shrug off. What this has led to is that we have learnt to adjust to almost everything even when we don’t have to. We subconsciously do it almost everyday, everywhere.

On the roads
It comes as no surprise to us if someone stops his car in the middle of the road and has a conversation with his best friend in the other car, when that someone takes a turn without giving an indication, successfully keeping his intent a secret till the very last moment, when he squats on the side of the road and does something foul smelling with his thing, when he comes together with other people in groups and starts walking on the road like the King of Universe while you try to figure out if it is in angst or in happiness – he materializes all his plans on the road with the biggest celebration of his life – getting married too, happening on the road. We adjust to all of this and more by simply waiting for our chance to get past.

At work
Since our superiors have traditionally been older than us and supposedly more knowledgeable and experienced we learn to obey and find it difficult to express disapproval – because disapproval is dissent and dissent is revolt which our system does not endorse. So we are caught in the confusion of condoning the wrong or fighting for the right. We do nothing and decide to let things be.

At home
Life is a song till you decide to get married – we either leave home or bring someone home. Both the situations are full of challenges. Tradition once again steps in. We tend to walk the tight rope, not wishing to tread on any feet whosoever’s they may be. We acquiesce and again let things be.

In politics  
The top politician for long is the quintessential grey haired, balding, stooping old men confused on whether to take control of their lives first or the country and we stand and watch and adjust to that as well. We pay taxes and watch them not making roads, not being able to provide the basics of electricity and water, not doing enough to uplift the poor, not providing healthcare and education, just to name a few. We adjust again thinking this is what best life has to offer.

From all others
We adjust and forgive all the non achievers. What this has led to is lowering of our expectations from everyone – so we accept our sportsmen failing dismally (or performing below par) and accepting it as the will of God, we accept terrorism as part of our lives, we accept our friendly neighbor dumping his garbage in front of our house or help him make changes to his house by letting him pile up all his construction material in our parking slot and we also accept the loud blaring of the religious sermons emanating from the place of worship with a smile – after all our prayer will not be accepted by Him unless it tests someone else’s peace. We accept everything. Our senses have been numbed into accepting mediocrity that life has to offer and live on. Sab chaltaa hai bhaai!!!



  1. very true!! but what I don’t understand is that has it done all bad? family system runs well if we let it be is one example of perhaps acceptance doing good.

  2. I was presenting one side of it. Acceptance is not all bad; acceptance – though it promotes mediocrity, it brings peace

    • hiii,
      My dear in ur blog u have written that we have been invaded by mongols,mughals nd britishers…and what abt the turks,huns,kushans and of course the aryans….
      u forgot to mention abt the porous and Alexander conflict…and how the alexander was forced to abort the invasion of india when he was taken aback by the superiority of the nand forces…
      Ur conclusion based on this argument that we have become subservient is way off mark…
      on the contrary the events mentioned above have induced diversity in our system which is the hallmark of acceptance..A society which is rigid and is not accepting cant survive for long…

  3. very well written mama, it is soo coincidental that i was watching something on the tv about India (some documentary) and it said the same thing. this condition (of total acceptance) was exemplified in a very nice way in that doc. the presenter said that when big multinational companies in the UK and the US hire indians to work for them, the companies have to teach them how to say NO. this is because the the graduates coming from india do not have the ability to say no ! whether this is due to a need to impress in new surroundings or just the way they have been raised like you said, it poses a massive problem for the employer becuase the bright new workers quickly burn out and naturally cant do ALL the work.
    i still believe however that this ability to accept eveything is one of the MANY things that makes India soooo great. 🙂

  4. :); There are many benefits of Acceptance; it does not disturb the apple cart and let people continue in their state of inertia, so it is good for overall peace but bad for development

  5. Well we accept that sometimes you take years before you write something new on the blog 🙂

  6. yes i agree sometimes the wait for a new post is horrible……….. but it is always the posts are always worth the wait 🙂 keep them coming mama

  7. You guys are amazing. Its been only a week since I wrote my last blog and you have started cribbing – you make me feel like a movie star. Btw I m writing this from my iPod – incredible isn’t it; the wireless router is an incredible invention.

  8. sid why don’t you ask your girlfriends – plural and pun is intentional; to visit the blog too 🙂

  9. hahaha……. this is way too deep and intellectual for them !!!! no im jokin i’ll ask my friends to check out your blog :). the key word there was friends not girlfriends !!!

  10. Well, I was referring to your previous gap – Sep 14 (Diminishing Divide), and then Oct 5 (Jeans).

  11. I think bhaiya you should write the blogs twice a week. Friday and Saturday??? Whats happening on Those Seven Hours front?

  12. When I was young I used to revolt and lived the consequences but now I as I have grown older (have I) I have realised that Acceptance gives a sense of peace and I have begun to like it more and more.

  13. Yaar u have touched a very sensitive topic. Actually we all (humans) have a common factor i.e. all of us r very impulsive and aggressive in our youth but age plays a pivotal role n we all become subtle n submissive as we grow mature ( not old ). So, undoubtedly, all of us should understand that if we accept the harsh realities of life and accomodate accordingly, it is adjustment; if we dont and react unwilling, it is compromise but we have to live with certain things . So, at times, acceptance is good n be happy for what we r blessed with. Coping up with situations n maintaining balance is what we call LIFE. ISI KA NAAM ZINDAGI HAI.

  14. If you wrote that from your iPod, shouldn’t the iPod be an incredible invention. 😉 Although, I do accept that the wireless router is an incredible invention too.

  15. Well, I just wrote the comment from my iPod. Now that the secret is out, its much less glamorous, isn’t it?

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